It may take a while to get there. But after two or three extensions and expansions of future loans to the Big Three automakers, Democrats in Congress and the Obama administration will be so financially and politically invested in Detroit's survival that they'll be addicted to throwing (the taxpayers') good money after bad.

I got suspicious the moment they proposed a government-appointed "auto czar" to run the industry. What an eerie reminder of the former Soviet Union and its fondness for government control of the economy, five-year plans and generic Volga automobiles. You'd think Democrats would be more comfortable calling the head guy the "autocrat."

Americans can find humor in almost any disaster, even the nationalization of our auto industry. Currently circulating on the Internet are several versions of a satirical ad by the soon-to-be Congressional Motors (not GM but CM). I've taken the liberty of editing and revising it:

"It's in the way you dress; the way you sign your unemployment check. You're a man who likes to do things your own way. And on those special Saturdays (when driving is permitted), you want it in your car. That enervating feeling of a zero-emissions wind at your back. The kind of feeling you get behind the wheel of the Pelosi GTxi SS/Rt Sport Edition from Congressional Motors.

"All new for 2012, the Pelosi is the mandatory American car, so advanced it took $500 billion and an entire Congress to design it. We started with the same, reliable seven-way hybrid ethanol, biodeisel, electric, clean-coal, wind, solar, pedal-power plant from the base-model Pelosi and packed it with extra oomph and the sassy styling pizazz that tells the world that 1974 Detroit is back again - with a vengeance.

"We've subsidized the features you want and taxed away the rest. With its advanced Al Gore-designed V-3 under the hood, the Pelosi Sport Edition pumps out a full 15 pony-power of Detroit muscle. You'll never be late for the disco or the day labor shelter. Engage the pedal drive or strap on the optional jumbo mizzenmast, and the new Pelosi easily beats 2016 CAFE mileage standards. At an estimated 68 MPG, that's a savings of nearly $1.50 per month in fuel costs over the 2011 Pelosi.

"Even with increased performance, we didn't skimp on safety. With 11-point passenger racing harnesses, 15-way airbags and mandatory hockey helmet, you'll have the security of knowing you could survive a hypothetical 45 mph collision, if the Pelosi were capable of reaching that illegal speed.

"But the changes don't stop there. Sporty mag-style aluminum-foil hubcaps and an all-new aggressive wedge shape, designed by CM's chief stylist, Harry Reid, slices through the wind like an omnibus spending bill.

"A special high-capacity hatchback holds up to 300 aluminum cans, meaning fewer trips to the recycling center. And the standard one-speaker Fairness Doctrine FM radio features all-NPR-all-the-time politically correct news when you insert your government-issued instant tax-credit card.

"Best of all, the Pelosi is made right here in the USA by unionized workers spared the inconvenience of secret-ballot elections, guided by visionary long-time Detroit managers and directed by the government-appointed 'autocrat.'

"And don't let the starting MSRP of $62,999.99 scare you. It's more affordable than you might think, after rebates, tax credits and wealth redistribution programs for dozens of qualifying special-interest and victim groups. Plus, there's a no-consequence, automatic default financing plan from Fannie Mae.

"So take the bus to your local CM dealer, today, and find out why the Pelosi GTxi SS/Rt Sport Edition is the only car endorsed by President Barack Obama. One test drive will convince you that you'd choose it over the import brands - if they were still legal."

Mike Rosen's radio show airs weekdays from 9 a.m. to noon on 850 KOA. He can be reached by e-mail at mikerosen@850koa.com.